this is quite goodhttp://www.viruscomix....
how is the middle of the week goign for everyone? I'm starving and am trying to hang on until it's a mroe reasonable lunch time.
EDIT: i just remembered this a mate told me . "how do you titilate an ocelot? you oscelate it's tits a lot"
I can't buy some candy from the vending machineas it run out of change and I have only 2 euro coins. :-(
I hate it when this happens, nothing makes me wanting a mars bar more than not beeing able to get one.
smash the fucker.
or ask a colleague for change.
On no-change days
small coins are pretty rare in the office. I'm off to the shops in an hour, it's cheaper there anyway.
No change days?
tis a strange forrin custom
obviously
they all wear the same pants as yesterday
As opposed to what day?
:+:
days when the vending machine has no change.
Do I need to draw a diagram?
Yes please.
Extra points will be awarded for internal workings.
Trust you lot to have it arranged to be a set day
that the machine will run out of change.
So's this
Ow!
can't the FBI zoom into that somehow
increasing the resolution.
I've seen in done on TV loads.
*surprised face*
It was just a student prank that went horribly wrong:-
i can't get youtube at work,
you'll have to describe it to me.
Woman using medieval style catapult
to fire watermelons suffers malfunction and gets one full in the face with hilarious consequences. Probably stung a bit, though it does burst.
The watermelon bursts,
not her face.
Girl, large catapult, watermelon, face
...
+ presenter telling the woman
she has to continue.
hahahahahahahaha Half a Chocolate Biscuit update
got this letter from McVitie's today...
http://a.imageshack.us...
I always use the name Hugh Jampton when complaining...
We tried that scam at university
and wrote to loads of companies either complaining or praising their products to see how many freebies we could blag.
The best one was to Smirnoff vodka complaining that their promo which gave away a shot glass with a bottle of vodka encouraged lone and anti-social drinking, my mate got another shot glass and a voucher for a free bottle!
I used to have an manager called Linda Woodward
whose writing was just like that.
What, a typeface?
That's neat handwriting
actually, its a real signature
biro has embossed the back of the letter
that is some poor fuck's job
to sign all those things all day.
Don't be silly.
There's a team of people signing those letters all day and they're the lucky ones. There's another team stuck on the phones dealing with customers all day who would love a job answering letters and emails.
It must be so boring for you
being around us stupid people all the time.
Oh my apologies,
I see now you were making a joke about the content of the letter, not the signature. In which case my above post still stands :)
It wasn't a particularly good joke, I know
But, yes, it does get trying sometimes...
;-)
hahahhahahaahahahahahahahahahahhaaaaaaa
I just spat tea at the wall
hahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahaa
BUT he is wrong...it is real writing
Not the signa...
...oh, never mind.
I don't like how they apologise for the inconvenience.
Surely a luxury item falling below expected standards is a disappointemnt and not much of an inconvenience
*prints and uses the voucher*
I doctored the number KNOWING
you would try that
dangnabbit
Hugh Jampton is a fine name
with a rich tradition. I first came across it on a Goon show record at age 9, and had to get my Dad to explain it.
I had to get the bear to explain it to me
when I first heard it
It's an anagram of
Huge Tampon
no its not
you've lost a 'J' and an 'h' and added an 'e' you silly billy
+:+
It's a British Army/Cockney rhyming slang joke.
Hampton Wick = prick.
Hugh Jampton = Huge 'ampton = large male genitalia.
it helps if you know what a hampton is
whcih I didn't
You do now.
That's more interesting than
the orange book I've got open in front of me
Jane Woodward
obviously doesn't listen to the Goons
bit meh.
Can't get my groove on today. Completely mojoless. I promised someone something by the end of the week and I really ought to get on with it. I don't even have any donkey work to be getting on with.
I might print a big policy and sit and read that.
I'm physically knackered but mentally alright...
i got on the bike this morning and the legs were moaning from the off... was a slower than average cycle.
I think you've got a fairexcuse for that though.
I can't hummus and I have no excuse.
I am enjoying the longer cycle to and from work (6.5 miles each way)
.. should loose a few pounds as well
Cool.
My colleague has joined a slimming club. She texted her son saying "I've lost five pounds!" He rang back two minutes later and said "I've checked down the back of the sofa and it isn't there, do you want me to look in your room?"
hehe makes me giggle too
however it sounds better if you confine the operation to a single mammary: "oscillate its tit a lot".
It sounds funny
but I nipped to chester zoo at lunch time and ocelots really don't like you playing with their tits.
*nurses scratches*
ta for this bold piece of field research
